Resources: Websites

Resources: Recommended Readings.
I. Marriage and divorce

Barbach, L. (1984). For Each Other: Sharing Sexual Intimacy. New York: Signet.

Brown, L. and Brown, M. (1986). Dinosaurs Divorce: A Guide for Changing Families. Boston: Little, Brown. (for preschool and elementary school children)

Carter, B. and Peters, J. (1996). Love, Honor, & Negotiate: Making Your Marriage Work. New York: Pocket Books. (Especially helpful when wife has sacrificed career to raise family - but good for any couple.)

Cristiansen, A. and Jacobson, N. (2000). Reconcilable Differences. New York: Guilford Press.

Evans, P. (1996). The Verbally Abusive Relationship: How to Recognize it and How to Respond. Avon, MA: Adams Media.

Garrity, C. and Baris, M. (1994). Caught in the Middle: Protecting the Children of High-Conflict Divorce. New York: Lexington.

Gottman, J. and Silver, N. (1999). The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work. New York: Crown Publishers.

Gray, J. (1992). Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus. New York: HarperCollins. (It's full of stereotypes but the stereotypes exist because it fits many men and women.)

Hendrix, H. (1990). Getting the Love You Want. New York: First Perennial Library.

Hetherington, M. and Kelly, J. (2002). For Better or for Worse: Divorce Reconsidered. New York: Norton. (Best book on effects of divorce on all family members - 30 years of longitudinal data.)

Luquet, W. (1996). Short-Term Couples Therapy: The Imago Model in Action. New York: Brunner/Mazel. (Many useful exercises for couples.)

Markman, H., Stanley, S., & Blumberg. (1994). Fighting for Your Marriage: Positive Steps for Preventing Divorce and Preserving a Lasting Love. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass.

Moore, T. (1994). SoulMates: Honoring the Mysteries of Love and Relationship. New York: HarperPerennial. (Challenging read, but digs deep into spiritual-psychological complexities of relationships - worth the effort.)

Pines, A. (1999). Falling in Love: Why We Choose the Lovers We Choose. New York: Routledge.

Ricci, I. (1997, Rev. Ed.). Mom's House, Dad's House. New York: Simon & Schuster.

Schnarch, D. (1997). Passionate Marriage. New York: W.W. Norton. (Best book on marital sexuality.)

Sheffield, A. (2003). Depression Fallout: The Impact of Depression on Couples. New York: HarperCollins.

Spring, J. and Spring, M. (1996). After the Affair. New York: HarperPerennial.

Tannen, D. (1990). You Just Don't Understand: Women and Men in Communication. New York: Ballantine.

Thayer, E. and Zimmerman, J. (2001). The Co-Parenting Survival Guide. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger.

Vaughn, D. (1990). Uncoupling. New York: Vintage Books.

Viorst, J. (2003). Grown-Up Marriage. New York: Free Press. (Exceptionally good review of all the myriad issues and challenges couples face.)

Wachtel, E. (1999). We Love Each Other, But.... New York: Golden Books.

Wallerstein, J. and Blakeslee, S. (1995). The Good Marriage. Boston: Houghton Mifflin. (A wonderful reminder of what it takes to make a marriage work.)

Wallerstein, J. and Kelly (1996). Surviving the Break-up: How Children and Parents Cope with Divorce. New York: Basic Books.

Weiner-Davis, M. (1992). Divorce-Busting. New York: Fireside

Weiner-Davis, M. (2003). The Sex-Starved Marriage. New York: Simon &Schuster.

Wile, D. (1993). After the Fight. New York: Guilford. (How to make up.)

II. Adult Life Issues

Albom, M. (1997). Tuesdays with Morrie. New York: Doubleday.

Bridges, W. (1993). Transitions: Making Sense of Life's Changes. Reading, MA: Addison-Wesley. (Excellent book and so much of life is about transitions.)

Borysenko, J. (1993). Mending the Body; Mending the Mind. New York: Bantam.

Brown, N. (2001). A Grown-Up’s Guide to Getting Over Narcissistic Parents. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger

Covey, S. (1990). The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. New York: Simon & Schuster. (A classic about clarifying priorities and organizing life to achieve your goals - worth repeated readings.)

Crimmins, C. (2000). The Mango Princess. New York: Knopf. (dealing with stroke in a spouse), Needham, ma

Davis, M, Eshelman, E., and McKay, M. (1995, 4th Ed.). The Relaxation & Stress Reduction Workbook. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger.

Doka, K. Living with Grief at Work, School, and Worship

Fanning, P. (1988). Visualization for Change. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger. (How to use visualization techniques to overcome a variety of problems.)

Fisher, R. & Ury, W. (1981). Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement without Giving In. NY: Penguin. (Classic book on how to negotiate successfully.)

Coleman, D. (1995). Emotional Intelligence. New York: Bantam Books. Jacobs, R. H. (1997). Successful Aging. New York: Pantheon.

Katz, M. (1997). On Playing a Poor Hand Well: Insights from the Lives of Those Who Have Overcome Childhood Risks and Adversities. New York. W.W. Norton.

Kushner, H. (1996). How Good Do We Have to Be? Boston: Little, Brown & Co. (Good for managing perfectionism and/or guilt.)

Kushner, H. (1981). When Bad Things Happen to Good People. New York: Avon

Loehr, J. and Schwartz, T. (2003). The Power of Full Engagement. New York: Free Press. (Proven strategies for maximizing athletic performance applied to other areas of life.)

Moore, T. (1992). Care of the Soul: A Guide for Cultivating Depth and Sacredness in Everyday Life. New York: HarperCollins. (Challenging but rewarding read.)

Osherson, S. (1986). Finding Our Fathers: How a Man's Life Is Shaped by His Relationship With His Father. New York: Ballentine Books.

Pelzer, D. (1997). The Lost Boy: A Foster Child’s Search for the Love of a Family. Health Communications.

Rowe, J. and Kahn, R. (1998). Be an Outrageous Older Woman. New York: HarperCollins.

Secunda, V. (1992). Women and Their Fathers. New York: Dell Publishing.

Seligman, M. (1990). Learned Optimism: The Skill to Conquer Life's Obstacles. New York: Pocket Books

Sishel, D. and Driscoll, F. (1999) Women’s Moods. Quill Publishing

Weiss, R. (1990). Staying the Course: The Emotional and Social Lives of Men who Do Well at Work. NY: Free Press.

III. Adult Problems

Bourne, E. (2000, 3rd Ed.). The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger

Burns, D. (1980/1992-paperback). Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy. New York: Avon.

Greenberger, D. and Padesky, C. (1995). Mind Over Mood: Change How You Feel by Changing the Way You Think. New York: Guilford Press.

Herman, J. (1997, 2nd Ed). Trauma and Recovery. New York: Basic Books.

Levenkron, S. (1998). Cutting: Understanding and Overcoming Self-Mutilation. New York: Norton.

Lew, M. (1990). Victims No Longer: Men Recovering From Incest and Other Childhood Sexual Abuse. NY: Harper Perennial.

McKay, Matthew & Fanning, Patrick. (1991). Prisoners of Belief. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger. (How to apply cognitive techniques to overcome problems.)

Rando, T. (1991). How to Go on Living When Someone You Love Dies. New York: Bantam.

Real, T. (1997). I Don't Want To Talk About It: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression. New York: Scribner.

Steinberg, M. and Schnall, M. (2001). The Stranger in the Mirror: Dissociation – The Hidden Epidemic. New York: HarperCollins. (Has brief questionnaires that allows reader to determine if dissociation may be sufficiently present to require professional help.)

Young, Jeffrey & Klosko, Janet. Reinventing Your Life. New York: Plume, 1993. (Defines 11 core issues, with questionnaires, that create adult life problems along with recommendations on how to understand origins and suggestions for behavior changes.)

IV. Child and Family

Bowlby, J. (1988). A Secure Base: Parent-Child Attachment and Healthy Human Development. New York: Basic Books. (His ideas now dominate what matters in good parenting.)

Brooks, R. and Goldstein, S. (2001). Raising Resilient Children. Chicago: Contemporary Books.

Clark, Lynn, SOS: Help for Parents, Third Edition (Paperback - Oct 30, 2005)

Covey, S. (1997). The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families. New York: Golden Books.

Damon, W. (1995). Greater Expectations. New York: Free Press Paperbacks.

Elkind, D. (1988). The Hurried Child: Growing Up Too Fast Too Soon. Reading, MA: Addison-Wesley.

Elkind, D. (1994). Parenting Your Teenager. New York: Ballentine.

Faber, A. & Mazlish, E. (1980). How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk. New York: Avon.

Fuchs, N. (1996). Our Share of Night, Our Share of Morning. San Francisco: HarperCollins. (How to bring spirituality into family life. Beautiful book.)

Giannetti, C and Sagarese, M. (1997). Raising Your Child Through the Maddening Yet Magical Middle School Years. New York: Broadway Books.

Greene, R. (1998). The Explosive Child. New York: HarperCollins.

Greenspan, S. (1989) The Essential Partnership. New York: Viking. (The concept of "floor time" and building bonds with very young children.)

Greenspan, S and Wieder, S. (1998) The Child with Special Needs. Reading, MA: Perseus Books.

Kagan, J. (1994). Galen's Prophecy: Temperament in Human Nature. New York: Basic Books.

Kurcina, M. (1991) Raising Your Spirited Child. New York: HarperCollins

Levine, Joni, Everything Parent's Guide to Tantrums (Paperback - Jun 1, 2005)

Lieberman, A. (1993). The Emotional Life of the Toddler. New York: The Free Press.

Madaras, L. and Madaras, A. (2000, 3rd). The What's Happening to My Body? Book for Boys. New York: Newmarket Press.

Madaras, L. and Madaras, A. (2000, 3rd). The What's Happening to My Body? Book for Girls. New York: Newmarket Press.

Martin, R. (1994). Out of Silence: An Autistic Boy's Journey into Language and Communication. New York: Penguin Books.

Mooney, J. and Cole, D. (2000). Learning Outside the Lines. New York: Fireside. (dealing with learning disabilities)

Nelson, J. (1987, 2nd). Positive Discipline. New York: Ballantine. (Focusing on rewarding desirable behavior instead of punishing undesirable behavior.)

Nelson, J. & Lott, L. (1994). Positive Discipline for Teenagers. Rocklin, CA: Prima Publishing & Communications.

Nelsen, Jane Ed.D: Erwin, Cheryl and Duffy, Roslyn Ann: Positive Discipline for Preschoolers: For Their Early Years--Raising Children Who are Responsible, Respectful, and Resourceful (Positive Discipline Library) (Paperback - Mar 27, 2007)

Osherson, S. (1995). The Passions of Fatherhood. New York: Columbine.

Phelan, T. (1993). Surviving Your Adolescents: How to manage and let go of your 13-18 year olds. Glen Ellyn, IL: Child Management, Inc.

Phelan, Thomas W. 1-2-3 Magic Effective Discipline for Children 2-12 (123 Magic) (Paperback - Feb 1, 2004)

Pipher, M. (1996). The Shelter of Each Other: Rebuilding Our Families. New York: Ballentine Books. (Puts contemporary family challenges in perspective.)

Pollack, W. (2000). Real Boys' Voices. New York: Random House. (Powerful interviews of Columbine teens that provides important insights about how society impacts boys.)

Rubenstein, A. and Zager, K. (2002). The Inside Story on Teen Girls. Washington, DC: American Psychological Association.

Schaefer, D. and Lyons, C. (1993). How Do We Tell the Children?: A Step-by step Guide for Helping Children Two To Teen Cope When Someone Dies. New York: Newmarket Press.

Sears, Martha and William, The Discipline Book How to Have a Better-Behaved Child From Birth to Age Ten (Paperback - Feb 15, 1995)

Seligman, M., Reivich, K., Jaycox, L. & Gillham, J. (1995). The Optimistic Child. New York: Houghton Mifflin.

Siegel, D. and Hartzell, M. (2003) Parenting from the Inside Out. New York: Putnam. (Brings latest in neurobiology into parenting guide.)

Silver, L. (1999, 2nd Ed.). Dr. Larry Silver's Advice to Parents on ADHD. New York: Times Books.

Simmons, R. (2002). Odd Girl Out: the Hidden Culture of Aggression in Girls. New York: Harcourt.

Swift, Madelyn, Discipline for Life. Getting it Right with Children (Hardcover - Oct 30, 1999)

Taffel, R. (1994). Why Parents Disagree: How Men and Women Parent Differently and How We Can Work Together. New York: William Morrow.

Turecki, S. (2000, 2nd). The Difficult Child. New York: Bantam.

Visher, E. and Visher, J. (1991, 2nd). How to Win as a Step-Family. New York: Brunnner/Mazel.

Wolf, A. (1991). Get Out of My Life ... but first could you drive me and Cheryl to the mall? New York: The Noonday Press.

Ziegler, R. (1992). Homemade Books to Help Kids Cope. New York: Magination Press.

V. Suicide

Ellis, T. and Newman, C. (1996). Choosing to Live How to defeat suicide through cognitive therapy. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger.

Fine, C. (1999, 2nd) No Time to say Goodbye Surviving the Suicide of a Loved One. New York: Broadway Books.

Heckler, R. (1994) Waking Up Alive The descent, the suicide attempt, and the return to life. New York: Ballentine.

VI. Substance Abuse

Hamill, Pete. (1994) A Drinking Life A Memoir. Boston: Back Bay Books.

Knapp, Caroline. (1997) Drinking A Love Story. New York: Delta.

Moyers, W.C. (2006) Broken New York: Penguin Group.

VII. Grief and Loss

Neeld, E.H. (2003, 2nd) Seven Choices Finding Daylight After Loss Shatters Your World. New York: Warner Books.

VIII. Career Changes

Bolles, R. (1992) What Color Is Your Parachute? Berkeley, CA Ten Speed Press. (Best self-help career book, period.)

Butler, T. (2007) Getting Unstuck How Dead Ends Become New Paths. Boston: Harvard Business School Press.

IX. Depression

Mark, J. Williams, G. Teasdale, J.D. Segal, Z. and Kabat-Zinn, J. (2007) The Mindful Way through Depression Freeing Yourself from Chronic Unhappiness. New York: Guilford Press.

Styron, W. (1990) Darkness Visible A Memoir of Madness. New York: Vintage Books.

X. Forgiveness

Enright, RD. (2001) Forgiveness is a Choice A Step-by-Step Process for Resolving Anger and Restoring Hope. Washington, DC. APA Lifetools.

Safer, J. (2000) Forgiving and Not Forgiving Why Sometimes It’s Better Not to Forgive. New York: Harper Perennial.

XI. Stress and Anxiety

Amen, DG. (1998) Change Your Brain, Change Your Life The Breakthrough Program for Conquering Anxiety, Depression, Obsessiveness, Anger and Impulsiveness. New York: Three Rivers Press.

Bourne, EJ. (2005) The Anxiety & Phobia Workbook, Fourth Edition. Oakland New Harbinger Publications.

Davis, M. Eshelman, ER, McKay M, Fanning, P. (2000) Relaxation and Stress Reduction Workbook. Oakland New Harbinger Publications.

XII. Attention Deficit Disorder

Hallowell, E. and Ratey, J. (1994) Driven To Distraction. New York Pantheon.

Kelly, K. and Ramundo, P. (1993) You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid, Or Crazy?! A Self-Help Book for Adults with ADD. Cincinnatti, OH: Tyrell & Jerem Press.

Nadeau, K. (1995) A Comprehensive Guide to Attention Deficit Disorder in Adults. New York Brunner/Mazel.

Nadeau, K. (1997) ADD in the Workplace. New York Brunner/Mazel

Solden, S. (1995) Women With Attention Deficit Disorder. Grass Valley, CA Underwood Books.

XIII. CDs

Here for Now, Elana Rosenbaum. Go to www.umassmed.edu/cfm

Mindfulness Meditation with Saki Santorelli. Go to www.umassmed.edu/cfm

Mindfulness Meditation Practice CDs with Jon Kabat. Go to www.mindfulnesstapes.com

cds/website for guided meditations: go to audiodharma.org

Borysenko, J. (2005) Meditations for Relaxation and Stress Reduction. Carlsbad Hay House Inc.

Weil, A. Kabat Zinn, J. (2001) Meditation for Optimum Health How to Use Mindfulness and Breathing to Heal Your Body and Refresh Your Mind. Louisville Sounds True.

XIV. Mindful Meditation

Full Catastrophe Living, John-Kabat-Zinn, Ph.D.; Delta Publishing

Here for Now: Living Well with Cancer Through Mindfulness, Elana Rosenbaum; Satya House Publications

Heal Thy Self: Lessons on Mindfulness in Medicine, Saki Santorelli, Ed.D.; Three Rivers Press, 1999

Radical Acceptance, Tara Brach, Ph.D., Bantam, 2003

The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion, Christopher K. Germer, Ph.D., The Guilford Press, 2009

The Mindful Way Through Depression, Mark Williams, John Teasdale,
Zindel Segal and Jon Kabat-Zinn; Guilford Press

Jon Kabat-Zinn, PhD Full Catastrophe Living, Using the Wisdom of Your Body and Mind to Face Stress, Pain and Illness

Elana Rosenbaum, MSW Here For Now -- Living Well with Cancer Through Mindfulness

XV. Addictions

David Sheff, Houghton, Mifflin, (2008) Beautiful Boy: A Father's Journey Through His Son's Addiction

Nic Sheff, Simon and Shuster, (2007) Tweak: Growing Up on Methamphetamines

William Cope Moyers and Katherine Ketcham, Penguin Group, (2006) Broken: My Story of Addiction and Redemption

Rachel Brownell, Conari Press, (2000) Mommy Doesn't Drink Here Anymore: Getting Through the First Year of Sobriety

Caroline Knapp, Dell Publishing, (1996) Drinking: A Love Story

Pete Hamil, Deidre Enterprises, (1994) A Drinking Life: A Memoir